i need an outlet...

was is it about me that makes boys just randomly sign off after i say something? am i that retarded?

so, dannys show is tomorrow. i want to go, but damn, i hate standing alone at shows and such. usually id go with brittany and drew because drew likes that stuff but since brittanys gone it just seems like drew hates me. gah, im i that fucking off-putting? i guess ive finally reached the "hate myself" point. blah, and i was having such a good few weeks, too.

ok, see, i dont want to sit with michael and co. on the bus if i have to listen to them talking about fingering girls. what am i suppost to say? "oh yeah, its really great if you..."

faren wants me to go to a haunted house with her. i dont know if i want to go. i really dont like the idea of being stuck in a huge ass scary maze thing for a few hours. its just not my kinda fun. well, its ok if im with A LOT of friends, but only one other person? ill have to think about it.

do i have any obligations this weekend? besides the show and the possible house call? i guess not. i do have to babysit sunday. gah, id like to spend one weekend doing nothing by laying around. theres always chores to be done though, ugh.

i think im going to try to start incorporating more french into my everyday life. maybe ill pop a few sentences in here and there. je n'apprende pas. (i think that could mean, "i dont know", i guess its more along the lines of, "i didnt learn/understand" oh well.)

je feux(?) lire ton livre. i cant conjugate "faire" (to want). ugh.

its been real.