12.16.03 5:17 pm
give me an "L"

did i used to be someone? was i at one point distingishable from everyone else? perhaps not in a big way, but in any way at all? to me i seem so boring, so lacking in personality. i want to talk to someone that can teach me better. i think id like to go to finishing school one day. id like to be elegant. i want to be graceful. i am so awkward and clumsy. but its something ive just learned to live with. i just laugh at everything. do i really find things so funny? i have bad posture. though every once-in-awhile i feel beautiful. something about today makes me feel this way. hahaha, even though im doubting myself. i think today, my eyes are grey.

i got a note from this kid on the bus today. i find it hard to believe he likes me when weve only "talked" about three times this year. and im so short and to the point. this kid is a senior, and it makes me sad. its steven from french I last year, if you read me back then and remember.

i only saw jeff for about 5 seconds today, asked where he was going and he said, "nowhere," and walked off. lucky bastard doesnt have to take but one exam.

most kids are going to be gone tomorrow. that sucks, because i love those kids! i am stuck at school till the very end. i will not let this happen next semester.

les parents are home.

its been real.